It's a long way back
by Cerulean Gaze
Summary: America is in a downward spiral and has not only let himself go but has also neglected in showing up to several meetings and has hidden away in a far corner of his country. Not by choice, Russia is forced to find the American and maybe beat some sense into him. Rather than returning America, the two find themselves traveling the country and rediscovering themselves and each other.
1. Amber Dreams

Starting another story, I have had...serious writers block on my other one. Sorry! I hope everyone enjoys and is interested in more! Will be M rated material in later chapters! I do not in any way own the characters, the show, the original concept, etc.

* * *

Alfred sighed as he ran his trembling hand through his hair for what seemed like the umpteenth time within the past hour. This was it. It was hell. He was officially part of a living hell. Even after the elections nothing had improved, his economy was still at a standstill. He didn't even want to begin thinking about all of the money he owed China and a few others. As it was, he had already skipped several meetings with his country's officials and a few of the other countries as well. Needless to say, a few were growing concerned, as they should be Alfred mused as he warily glanced at his gloomy reflection in the window to the side of his desk overlooking the outskirts of a just as gloomy Portland.

He came here when he wanted to escape; he found that the weather often matched his mood, especially at this time of the year. Cold, dark, unforgiving; it was how he felt at the moment. He felt completely hopeless and knew that that this time around, it would take a lot more than England showing up and setting him straight. He wanted to punch something…scratch that, Alfred needed to completely desolate something, anything, and everything. What happened to his sunny days?! The days when he would walk among his citizens in every corner of his country and beam in pride at their achievements and their ever moving forward attitude that was so like his own?

"Who am I kidding?!" America seethed as he swept his arm across his desk and in turn knocked his phone and an assortment of pictures taken in happier times to the floor.

Nothing was going to get better, not his economy, not his country, or his citizens. He was in an ever growing decline. He was crumbling. It would never get better. It always did in the end…but how long would that last?! It was a cycle, a cycle in which each time the bad times came, they ended up lasting longer than the last time. What was his life worth anymore? What more could he do?

"Not a damn thing." America murmured as he opened a desk drawer and pulled out a glass bottle, the amber contents of the whiskey swirling as he pulled the top off and flung it across the room before leaning back in his chair and tipping the contents of the bottle down his parched throat.

Letting a small smile fall into place, Alfred felt his arm slip and drop the now empty bottle onto the dark carpeted floor, the bottle miraculously landing safely and rolling to the corner of the room. He could the feel the effects of the alcohol taking place, slowly lulling him into a deep intoxicated slumber. Hopefully he wouldn't dream…hopefully he wouldn't wake.

* * *

"He hasn't been answering any calls." England stated as he strolled into the World Conference Center meeting room before sitting down at his usual place beside France and Canada, the only thing amiss was the empty seat to his right which usually contained a loud and obnoxious blond.

"Maybe he is sick?" Hungary mused aloud as she tapped her pin against her chin, confused herself as to why America would skip out on yet another meeting. The meetings only took place once every few months, and more if need be and while it was common place for a country to not be able to make them all, it was downright odd for America to miss more than three in a row.

"We have contacted his boss, all he would tell us is that America is feeling out of sorts and is dealing with some internal business at the moment." Germany replied as he stood and set his pack of documents on the table in front of him.

"Internal business my ass! His boss does not even know where the hell he is! All of this nonsense is just cover-up for their panic." China yelled as he slammed his hands on the table. "He just does not want to pay me back, aru."

"I agree with China." Russia smiled from his space between the mentioned country and Ukraine. "The capitalist pig is afraid and does not know what to do. I believe someone should go find him, I am merely concerned, da?" Russia suggested as he leaned forward in his seat slightly, resting his chin on his hands.

"Then if you are so concerned, why don't you just go and check on his yourself then?" England seethed as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Amerika would not wish to be seeing me as relief to his growing depression…but if you are wanting me to go…"

"Definitely not." France butted in as he placed his hand on England's shoulder, stopping the Brit from taking the Russian's bait.

"I actually thing it might be an excellent idea." Switzerland spoke up from across Germany as he stood to continue. "If America is feeling the way everyone seems to think, it might be good for he and Russia to simply beat the living hell out of each other. They are both forbidden from killing the other or causing any world problems due to any conflicts between them, therefore it would not harm any of us. Also, with the way America is, it just well might lift his spirits. I also believe Russia to be the only one that has a chance of standing up to the brute."

"Just a chance? How much so you underestimate me my dear Switzerland." Russia smiled as his dark aura seemed to grow in intensity, effectively dropping the temperature of the room a few degrees,

"Then it is settled." Germany grimaced as he stood and motioned that the meeting was over. "Russia, you will leave to find America and solve this issue within the next three days, I suggest you pack a wide variety of clothes…who knows in which part of his country America will be hiding." Germany closed as he walked out of the room with a few of the other countries who were just as eager to leave, not wanting to see Russia or England's reaction to the decision. He just really hoped that Switzerland was right. Either that or he just set forth a notion that in which one of the most powerful country's on Earth was going to cease to be.


	2. Waking up

Thanks for checking out! I don't have internet at my apartment yet so I had to wait to post until I came home. Hope you enjoy! Please review!

Don't own ANYTHING! ...sadly

* * *

Russia sighed as he let his face rest against the cool glass of the plane. He hated long plane rides…especially when the end destination was America. He just couldn't figure out why he had agreed to do this. Yes, he had been practically forced into it by the other countries…but when did he start taking orders? Part of him reasoned it was because he wanted to be the one to find America defenseless and completely venerable so that he could knock him down even more so. Another part of him; however, even though he refused to acknowledge that part of himself was slightly concerned. The stupid American hadn't been seen at all lately…and who was he supposed to argue with during meetings when he was gone? Everyone else either ignored him or practically wet their pants if he even attempted any kind of banter. Only he would meet him head on without an ounce of fear. It was nice, it felt like America actually saw…Ivan when they fought, and that was as good as any reason to traverse the United States to find the other.

"I'll still kill him when I find him though." Russia muttered under his breath as he shifted in his seat, the human beside him not going unnoticed as they began to shake in fear at his words.

"We'll be landing at the Ronald Reagan International Airport in Washington D.C. within the next ten minutes, please turn off all electronic devices and buckle up, thank you for flying with us."

"Finally." Russia yawned as he stretched his arms and buckled his seat, hoping to God that he would find the lazy blond in his D.C. home passed out on the couch…that however seemed unlikely. He was sure D.C. was probably the very first place that had been checked for the missing country. Russia had already been given word that America's boss wanted to speak with him briefly after hearing that the larger country would be looking for him. He just hoped the man had some ideas on where America would be and wasn't going to try to turn this into some political 'Russia bonds with America' thing.

Across the country as Russia's plane landed in D.C. Alfred had just woken up disoriented as he usually was for the past couple of weeks. He needed to get a grip on himself he concluded when he realized that he had no idea what day it even was…or he could just continue to laze about his Portland home. The second option sounded much nicer, but he figured he should probably at least take a shower and get ready to go into town. He needed to go shopping as his fridge was completely barren. Although it wasn't healthy he had been so caught up in his pity party he had forgotten to eat for who knows how long and his appearance had taken a slight toll. He was by no means unfit as he was a country and he was always able to retain peak physical form…if he wanted to. So what if he had slight curves here and and there, he looked good and he knew he did. Although he did try to hide his ever so slightly more feminine figure from the World. What would the others say if they knew? No doubt they would make fun of him even more than they already did.

"Just a bunch of assholes." America sighed as he ran his hands through his hair on his way to his spacious master bath. Talking about the others, America was slightly ticked that none of them had made any effort to find him. Sure he had received some phone calls…mainly from England and his brother…but he just hadn't been in the mood to explain anything when they had called. What would he say?! "Sup?! Sorry, I've been an emo and been chillin' here in Oregon hating my life and throwing an immense pity party every single night!" …Yup that would be a great conversation.

As he turned on the water faucet to hot and turned on the shower, America practically threw his clothes off before stepping into the natural stone shower, closing the clear glass doors behind him. He let his head fall back into the spray as he turned and looked out the fogging doors at the rest of the bathroom. It was a perfect escape. All dark natural stone with pops of red color, very rustic yet chic he reasoned as he let a small smile slip onto his face. His Portland home was one of his favorites for a reason. The government and a few select others knew of his home in D.C. and a few other states but this one was one of his best kept secrets. Only he knew of it and had even helped build it. It was completely customized, every detail down to the last doorknob.

After he had finished admiring his bathroom, Alfred figured he had wasted enough time and got straight to the rest of his shower routine before turning the water off, stepping out of the shower and heading over to his bathroom vanity to finish the rest of his routine.

Emerging from his room an hour later clean and freshly dressed, America hummed a bit as he descended the large wooden stairs to the first floor and walked through his spacious living room complete with a large screen LED and every game system imaginable…and that wasn't even mentioning the amazing leather couch he had had custom built so that it was large enough to fit ten people sitting side by side with elbow room but wide enough to allow comfortable sleeping arrangements if need be. He soon found himself entering the kitchen where he grabbed his set of keys from the hook by the kitchen door before exiting the house, making sure to lock the door behind him.

"Which car…"Alfred wondered aloud as he cocked his hip and scratched his chin in a very contemplative manner as he looked at the two cars in his driveway before deciding that he should be sensible and unlocked the door to his red Jeep Patriot and climbed in, revving the engine a bit before he threw the car into reverse and started the twenty minute drive into Portland. He figured he would save the Volvo for another day.

* * *

"What do you mean 'You have no clue'?!" Russia raised his voice as he glared at the American president from across his desk in the Oval Office.

"I told you, America gets in these moods from time to time and we have found out throughout the many years that it is best to leave him be unless absolutely necessary."

"How can that be considered the best thing to do?!" Russia seethed as he clenched his fists. How could you just leave your country alone when he needed company the most?! He just couldn't understand the thought process of America or his government, not that he even wanted to though.

"All we are asking is that if you do find him, you do not bring any harm to him."

"Nothing permanent will be done, that I will promise." Russia leered as he shook the president's hand before turning to leave.

"That is what I'm afraid of; however, the United Kingdom called and told us to unfortunately sit back and see what happens…and we figure if Britain can agree to this then we might as well. What else are we doing after all?"

Russia was honestly surprised to hear that England had given the ok…he figured the Brit would have called and demanded he be kicked out of the country immediately so as to not damage his 'precious little brother's mind'…he wouldn't make any promises.

After exiting the white house, Russia hailed a cab and made his way to the American's D.C. town home. Carrying, his suitcase up the small set of steps to the door Russia took out a piece of paper with an attached key. France had snuck him the key after the meeting saying it would come in handy and had then left just as quickly as he had come...but Russia could almost swear that he had heard the Frenchman laughing perversely under his breath as he made his escape.

Entering the house, Russia wasn't surprised to see that it looked completely unlived in. Sure it was completely furnished and spotless…but there was just a sense of lifelessness in the home. Like it hadn't been lived in for well over a year.

"Figures! Of course it couldn't have been that easy." Russia breathed out as he put his luggage beside the couch before sitting down and lying back. It had been a long day…America was still yet to be found so he might as well take a nap.

* * *

"Ahn!" Alfred moaned as his hair was gripped and his head forcible thrown back, exposing his long neck that had already been littered with love bites. He wanted this, needed it, and loved it. He always looked forward to being completely dominated by the other, and his wish was always granted. All he had to do was beg.

Alfred moaned wantonly as his legs were forced apart, a strong thigh coming to rest between them before being replaced with an even stronger pair of clothed hips, rubbing up against his ass through his own now unbearably tight pair of jeans. He could feel the throbbing cock just beneath the fabric, if only he could free his hands from the others iron clutch and yank their clothes off.

"Ahn! Please!" America panted as he closed his eyes and attempted to rub up against the larger man.

"What do you want?" The other whispered in his ear making the blond reduce into a puddle of goo.

"You, I need you. Fuck me!" Alfred yelled out unashamed as he threw his head back as the other bit his shoulder drawing blood.

"If you say so, Amerika."

America's eyes went wide before everything went black.

"Fuck!" Alfred panted as he bolted into an upright position from his bed. He knew eating those strawberries without washing them from the market earlier was a bad idea.

"What the hell was that?!" the blond wondered aloud as he ran his hands down his face. That dream had been completely random and completely…amazing. He hadn't been this turned on in a very long time and it was all that stupid commie's fault. How could he just pop into his dreams like that?! It was so rude and so completely unfair. He hadn't seen let alone even talked to Ivan in well over 5 months and sure he was attracted to the larger country…he had been for a very long time. Everyone including Russia just wrote off the tension between them from the Cold War and Alfred's inability to forgive…when in all honesty he just really needed the other to throw him over a desk and fuck his brains out. Was that too much to ask for?!

America laughed as he glanced down at his straining problem.

"Why the hell not?" Alfred sighed as he slipped his hand down his body imaging it to be a much larger hand of a certain Russian. If he couldn't have the Russian in real life, at least he could indulge in a fantasy or two by himself.

All he wanted was the ability to erase all the fights between the two of them. A long time ago before the Cold War they had been very good friends and there had once been a spark of something more. They could have been together…but that was just wishful thinking. They would have ended up this way anyways. Countries rarely every kept relationships throughout their many years.

* * *

Honestly I wrote all of this in one night and I hadn't slept for over 24 hours sooooo...work in progress haha...


End file.
